If your under unbelievable stress because of the season. Take a step back and reevaluate your life. You don’t have to live up to anyone’s expectations. The season is really supposed to be about spending time with friends and family. This means enjoying each other. The present thing is a commercialization of the season. Too many people have forgotten what the holidays are supposed to be about.
This might allow you to start to get some breathing room. This is about creating your own traditions. It supposed to be fun! Not stressful! If your family is all about the presents and gifts that okay. This is not a judgement! The holidays have basically been hijacked by the retailers with their marketing campaigns to guilt you to buy.
Some families are in different financial situations. Some haven’t noticed a change in theirs. If you have been hit hard by finances where your holding on by a shoe string. Your priorities are still in survival mode. Many people are just trying to keep a roof over their heads. A nice way to celebrate the season might be to play board games this season. Some of you might not have a clue what a board game is. Reading a book that embraces the season might be a nice choice for the family or if your solo. See no cost ideas. It doesn’t have to be about spending money and it shouldn’t be!
As we get closer to the Solstice and the Holiday Season, please just enjoy your family and friends. Share food or time with each other. If you enjoy food, just take time to enjoy the process of creating the food. It’s also a good time for family to each prepare part of the meal or making cookies or deserts together. Take time to enjoy eating together. If your thing is to watch a seasonal movie together then go for it.
Here’s the thing, as a society we are sick and damaged. This is the part that makes the least sense though. We have many agencies that are supposed to help people and families heal. Violence in our lives is not an economic thing or even an occupation thing. We have batters of women, children and even men in our society.
We as a society should be healing and growing. We should be trying to change our family dynamics so that child abuse, battery of women, men and even rape are no more. Some people will point the finger at the Justice System. Here’s the thing with the Judges’ depending on the state the Judges’ hands may be tied by what their allowed and not allowed to do. How do I even know this? I studied criminal justice once upon a time.
I can’t even say I have the answer. None of it makes sense, it used to be people thought many of these crimes were more likely to happen in families that were in poverty. This theory soon goes out the window when you see this same pattern in middle class and upper class families. Is it a learned behavior? Maybe, yes and no. Children are especially vulnerable to this pattern when picking their future mates. I don’t think any person sets out to carry this on as a family tradition. In many, cases each generation is a little less violent than the one before.
The agencies can be the problem themselves, some people go into social work to make a difference or to appear to make a difference. The child protection agencies aren’t that great either. Some of these agencies step in too late. Part of the problem is that the case workers don’t know what to look for? They ignore the calls from neighbors telling them the children are being neglected. They have no idea what a starving infant or child looks like. Almost sounds like some shit out of a third world country right.
It’s amazing how developed countries are still sick themselves. Now to get to that part about violence being a learned behavior. Here’s why I said maybe and no. Law enforcement and soldiers have in some cases been known to batter their families. In some of these cases seeing so much violence can start to desensitize them to it. Stress can also play a part. Everyone has a different breaking point.
As far as we’ve come as a society, we still have much further to go to become truly civilized. I don’t think this is just an American thing either. We don’t truly have a culture, since we are composed of lots of subcultures. It’s surprising to have so much violence still going on in the 21st Century.
This time of year people think of it as a time to make a sacrifice in their life. Why not think of it as a time to purge the things or people who you’ve out grown. It might be a time to stop allowing people to dump their drama all over your life.
Yes, life happens and there are unexpected events that occur beyond our control. There are also cause and effect dramas that are not beyond Peoples control too. Instead of trying to solve everyone’s problems. See if they can’t start learning from their mistakes. These are the one’s that they caused all by themselves.
Think of it almost as parenting skills to allow a person to find their own solutions on their own journey in life. Sometimes life gets really dirty and messy too. No one learns anything when people are constantly rescuing them from themselves.
This is not to say that you shouldn’t be emotionally supportive when life throws a person a curve ball that no one expected. Sometimes these lessons are a test to help a person learn new skills or to make them emotionally stronger to survive a future event. This does not mean the person is a bad person and that’s why these things happened to them.
Just remember everything that you’ve learned is never a waste of time. You will use it in some capacity in the future to help yourself or others.
Sometimes it companies or services that we’re forced to use that are causing us unnecessary stress and drama. If it’s a company that you work for? Maybe its time to look for a different position either inside or outside of that company. If it’s a service, you always have the right to refuse to use it. There is nothing worse than a service that consistently is not meeting it’s promises.
Caller Id like voice mail is designed as a tool to weed out unnecessary calls. Weed out is the key word here. If your goal is to have more peace in your life your going to have to weed that garden sometime. You will be amazed at how much more peaceful and enjoyable your life becomes.
When you’ve had enough of crazy, and decided to take back your life. You can start with baby steps. You can either look at the controlling people in your life or the people who are a pain in the ass in your life. They usually end up being the same.
Turn off the news be it cable, computer, tv or radio. You’ll feel much better and actually able to do more in your life. No one needs portable instant stress in their life. Most of you have probably never allowed your home to be totally silent. It might feel strange at first but once you do it. You’ll be amazed at how much calmer you will feel. You will feel your shoulders and breathing relax more.
Your probably thinking that there is no possible way to get rid of those annoying people in your life. That little invention of caller id, voice mail or answering machine is the answer to those problems. Nothing wrong with screening your calls. It encourages the to move on to someone else or to actually work on getting a life of their own.
Boundaries are not just for land or homes. When you teach people boundaries, you are teaching them respect. You are telling them that you are not a door mat to be walked all over. You are an individual that has a life, thoughts and feelings of your own. You don’t need outside advise that’s not asked for. You are not a child but an adult that deserves to be treated with equal respect.
Recently, I looked down at my fingers and noticed for the first time. A scar that had been on my fingers since I was eleven was finally gone. Which is sort of interesting since I’ve been doing a lot of house cleaning in my personal life. I had made a decision in 2006, that those family members that weren’t positive influences would have to go. I had been doing this year after year.
Finally the last few people who had to go were last year. It gets pretty easy when they’ve finally crossed the final boundary. I did notice other changes in other areas of my life as well. More opportunities coming in from different areas of my life. Some of the things are reminisce of when I was in my early 20’s.
Some people think that only soldiers suffer from post traumatic stress. The truth is that all people whether its emotional or physical scars suffer from this syndrom. Each person has to face their demons on their own terms and deal with it when they are ready.
People that think these people should just move on or not dwell on it have no clue. Certain situations can trigger these memories. Some people will get help from a trained therapist. This is one of the best things for them as long as the therapist feels comfortable for that individual.
Others choose to go it alone thinking that they can some how get a grip on it themselves. This is true for some people but not all. It takes being extremely honest with yourself. Not all people can do this. This is one of the reasons why support groups have formed to make it a safe environment for those individuals that might not be ready for therapy.
All of these changes are about taking one step at a time. It takes a lot of bravery to admit that you can’t do it alone. This doesn’t make the individual crazy. It’s a healing process that can take time. Some people will go to a therapist for a while and then take a break and come back to them when their ready again. This is perfectly normal.
I always encourage my clients to see someone that they are comfortable with. It’s a step in taking back control of your life.
Just like Valentine’s Day is associated with flowers and roses. The Chakra system is associated with flowers as well. The chakra system has flower representing them. Open flowers to be exact.
Lots of opportunities coming into your life. You probably have a lot of flowers or chakras open on your energy system. Like a lot of fireworks going off celebrating what you want in your life and more bonus gifts.
Having lots of things not going right in the money department. You probably have some closed flowers or chakras. Starting to see how this works! Lots of gifts and bonuses equals lots of open flowers (chakras).
When your energy centers become blocked. It can mean you have a lot of stress or toxic environments that your navigating on a daily basis. The reason these energy centers close is to protect you. If this goes on for too long you can start to become physically ill.
By clearing the debris from your chakras (energy centers). It is detoxing the aura (energy field) around the physical body as well. When this is done your chakras (energy centers) will start to open up again and see more and more positive changes enter your life. Word of warning, if you need to change jobs because of your health and you become stubborn about taking the action. The Universe will take action.
You want to keep that in mind. Do you want the changes on your terms or the Universe to step in. When the Universe steps in it can mean that you become unemployed on unemployment to get a better job that is less stressful.
So far January of 2016 is starting out without a bang. I have had some weird twists but some of those are related to mercury in retrograde. I have had people from my past thrown back on to my path. I will start to communicate some of them and come what may it will definitely determine who will stay and who will go?
I’m in a bit of a holding pattern on some changes. No matter how many times I try to do something it keeps hitting a wall. So I’m letting it be for now. I’ve seen some areas start to open up more than they have in the past. I also think, it has to do with some shifts that I’ve made in my home recently. I am definitely seeing the changes.
That saying about when one door closes another opens is definitely very true. Sometimes it can almost be like an elevator. The reason the door hasn’t opened yet, is because you haven’t reached your floor yet. Earlier in the week, I had warned a friend to have various plans in place for work. Tonight she called and her work is considering moving out of state. The other shoe definitely did drop. This is how the Universe works, when a person and an environment no longer fit. You can fight kicking and screaming but it won’t really matter when you no longer fit each other.
It will be interesting to see what the Universe has in store for her. I do think it will all be good things. That’s how the Universe works. It is always the bringer of better gifts. Sometimes it takes us a while to realize all of those gifts but they are gifts. Less stress, no more working with co-workers that annoy us.
Sometimes the messages are much stronger from the Universe; like when you are nearly suffocated not once but twice by two different peoples perfume at two different companies. What are the odds on that one! LOL! Oh and because your still stubborn for the finale. Lets have you pass out twice at the last company. Not because theres a medical condition but because your a light worker and you need to get your butt on your spiritual path. How’s that for the Universe kicking your Ass personally!!
When I tell people that are thinking about getting more spiritual that their life will change. I’m not joking! Some people might lose their spouse, job or friends because they no longer fit each other. Thats how change works! There is no half way about it. It’s not like just taking some things to a charity and you feel a little lighter because you got rid of some things. You are now walking in both worlds the physical and the spiritual. Things that didn’t used to effect you in the physical now will. Why? Because the rules have changed! You can’t pretend that things don’t exist when you now know they do! Denial will smack you up side your head with the new reality!
The learning how to fly lesson is a real fun one too. Why ? Because your learning how to write it as you go. There is no manual! No one can teach you how to do this! It is a very personal journey for you alone! Why ? Only you know what you have yet to learn, heal and grow from. It’s like feeling around in the dark with your shoe to see where the next step is or isn’t.