There are many of us, who have no clue who we really are? We don’t know how life works for us. What do I mean by that? Well most of us have been surrounded by others and never had a moment to intimately get to know ourselves. If you’re an empath, this can be its own kind of hell. Picking up everyone’s shit. Thinking that your depressed when your picking up on the people who live with you. Having headaches that aren’t yours.
You might have no idea what I’m talking about. Everyone should be required to live by themselves to actually get to know themselves. This means finding out what stuff is really yours and what is not. What stuff is just bleeding off another and dumping onto you. One thing, that I’ve learned is that the things I used to think were mine. Were in fact someone elses. That means facing the dark side of yourself and giving it a great big wet one.
Society, likes to shove all their dogma down our throats as though it is a fact. When really it is a form of control and shaming. A way to make people feel like shit about themselves so they won’t stand up for themselves. Won’t have more self-confidence. Once you intimately get to know yourself. You will never go back. You learn that those parts, that you’ve been told are un-loveable are really strengths that have yet to be accepted.
When you start to accept all of who you are? You will find that you are finally becoming a whole person. That part of yourself that you wanted to eliminate will stop having its tantrums; when you finally accept it and allow it to play in more healthy ways. Sounds like parenting a child! In a way, it very much is. Reading parenting books might sound crazy but if you want to win this war that will be your best course.
This will help you integrate your shadow side, it will allow you to get to know yourself without judgement. Everyone hates to be judged, the shadow is no different. Schedule time with yourself so that you can start to allow it to heal and play. Think you’re the only one that didn’t get the manual on how the world works for you. Trying to move forward when no doors or window will open up. Many will say it’s all about taking action. If you’ve already taken many actions. Then you might want to examine what area of your life hasn’t had attention for sometime.
This answer might be about getting out in nature. It might be about actually taking time to enjoy live instead of allowing it to pass you by. When was the last time you actually played. Play isn’t only for children. After all that demon that you call your shadow didn’t just come out of no where. It came from being ignored and suppressed because it’s not acceptable. It is part of you whether you like it or not. It will come out less with less drama when it’s allowed to play more.
Play also allows you to move forward when everything else has been tried. Especially when your stuck tight and not knowing what you’re doing wrong. Play can be playing ball, listening to music, playing musical instruments. Writing, drawing or even painting. When we get out of balance our lives can suddenly seem like its hitting the pavement.
Most of us, were never taught what balance is? We only start to realize its out of control, when it starts to take on a life of its own. This is why the key is to get to know yourself so you can try to steer your life in the direction you want it to go.
Penny J. (MN, USA)
Raven Hawke, Llc