With us being in the New Year, think about the changes that you want to make in your life. What do you like? What do you hate? What’s so-so? In some ways its similar to cleaning out your closet. What do you want to do, but haven’t had much time for? By making incremental changes you can start to chip away and make the life you would really like.
Do you like where you live? Like the location but maybe not how your house looks. Can you do a remodel or would you rather live in a different house? People in our life, are they changing with us or are you finding that you have nothing in common? By pulling somethings apart and taking a closer look at whats working and whats not.
Take small bite size changes, this way its easier to see if your going in the right direction or if things are starting to fall apart? If you’re a feeling person this will be easier for you. Feel how these changes feel to you. Are you getting anxious? calmer or excited. If you are feeling panicked in any way. Back off from those changes. Changes should not send you into panic mode.
If you going into panick mode don’t move forward. We have fear in our life for a reason. It’s to prevent us from jumping into danger. Anyone that pushes you to go into a panick mode isn’t a smart person to have in life decisions. Change will feel different, but it should either make you feel calm or excited. Before making changes in your life, you might want to check in and see how you feel about it before making the change.
Having calmness in your life is a good gage. It means that your making sound or good decisions. Change should not bring on a panick attack. If your learning a new skill and only understand the minimum. It might be a good idea to work under a person who has those skill sets mastered until you feel more comfortable.
Things that are less risky financially, can be played with or tweaked to see what works or what doesn’t. Unless you can find a mentor, who is doing something that you’re trying to do. Just remember there are many ways to change and learn things.
Tonight I was thinking about a very weird spiritual experience I had in my early twenties. It was around 4 am, because all the fun things happen around that time. I was in bed sleeping and when I felt my hair blowing and standing on edge. I could feel this arctic cold blast of air blowing. The thing was, this air was coming from an inside wall. I remember becoming fully awake and being terrified of where this air was blowing from. I tried to breathe as quietly as possible. My hair was blowing and standing on edge. I had goose bumps on my air with fear.
I remember hearing in my head the golden key. Hears where the real irony comes in. In 2006 I renamed my business from Tarot by Penny to Raven Hawke. I renamed it because I was adding healing to my business. I also kept seeing a raven and hawk together over and over. I took this as a sign to be the new name for my business. I soon had to think of a mission statement. I then decided to name it “Spiritual Change for Positive Growth”. For whatever reason, I decided to look up what the golden key meant. There are several stories and meanings. It is very ironic that two stories each have a part of the mission statement.
Who knew, I’d name it after different aspects of the golden key? I had a similar experience with one of my paintings. In 2015 I was painting Nefertiti in water colors. I couldn’t think how to spell her name at the time when I was titleing the painting; so I just settled on signing it Beauty. Later when I looked up her name, it means beauty.
I will say that being on a spiritual journey is never dull. It will be challenging and you will sometimes wish you had a manual. This journey is unique to you and you alone. That’s why sometimes our paths are meant to be walked alone. This is about getting to know yourself and knowing Spirit on a personal level. These are things, that religion can never truly teach you.
Your are never being judged on this journey! There is no pass/fail? This is your personal journey to allow yourself to grow and learn. There is no right or wrong decision-making. It is about getting more comfortable in your own skin. It is making the best decisions at the time for you. After all who else could you be? This is your journey and it does not ask permission or acceptance. It is about making it the best journey for you. It’s about finding peace within yourself.
Here’s the thing, as a society we are sick and damaged. This is the part that makes the least sense though. We have many agencies that are supposed to help people and families heal. Violence in our lives is not an economic thing or even an occupation thing. We have batters of women, children and even men in our society.
We as a society should be healing and growing. We should be trying to change our family dynamics so that child abuse, battery of women, men and even rape are no more. Some people will point the finger at the Justice System. Here’s the thing with the Judges’ depending on the state the Judges’ hands may be tied by what their allowed and not allowed to do. How do I even know this? I studied criminal justice once upon a time.
I can’t even say I have the answer. None of it makes sense, it used to be people thought many of these crimes were more likely to happen in families that were in poverty. This theory soon goes out the window when you see this same pattern in middle class and upper class families. Is it a learned behavior? Maybe, yes and no. Children are especially vulnerable to this pattern when picking their future mates. I don’t think any person sets out to carry this on as a family tradition. In many, cases each generation is a little less violent than the one before.
The agencies can be the problem themselves, some people go into social work to make a difference or to appear to make a difference. The child protection agencies aren’t that great either. Some of these agencies step in too late. Part of the problem is that the case workers don’t know what to look for? They ignore the calls from neighbors telling them the children are being neglected. They have no idea what a starving infant or child looks like. Almost sounds like some shit out of a third world country right.
It’s amazing how developed countries are still sick themselves. Now to get to that part about violence being a learned behavior. Here’s why I said maybe and no. Law enforcement and soldiers have in some cases been known to batter their families. In some of these cases seeing so much violence can start to desensitize them to it. Stress can also play a part. Everyone has a different breaking point.
As far as we’ve come as a society, we still have much further to go to become truly civilized. I don’t think this is just an American thing either. We don’t truly have a culture, since we are composed of lots of subcultures. It’s surprising to have so much violence still going on in the 21st Century.
Some people think it would be neat to be a psychic medium. Sometimes it can be a pain in the ass. When the dead just won’t move along and mind their own business. Like actually getting a life of their own. Oh the things they love to mess with.
Electronics come to the top of the list to name a few. Yes, the life without a body, no boundaries or restrictions. Oh and if they were a jealous person with a body, they certainly haven’t changed their tune. That’s how the ghost world works. Still ego driven.
This is why it’s such a good idea to set boundaries when these people are alive. Gives them practice for when they decide not to cross over. Gives new meaning to meddling relatives. This is where tough love comes in handy with lots of boundaries.
This is the time when it’s best to embrace your inner Badass! Being nice and soft and fluffy will not work! It’s time to push back and kick their ghostly ass to the curb that they aren’t allowed to mess with your life. Because that’s exactly what they’ll do if you don’t step up.
They’re usually bored and want some excitement in their non-lives. They are not wise in any regards. They’re just ego! The best thing that could happen to them is to cross over.
When is the last time you’ve actually stood up for yourself. To many people are used to not making waves. Which is quite ironic if you think about the fundamentals this country was founded on.
When is the last time you took inventory of those people who are emotionally supportive and those that are not? It’s kind of like cleaning out your closet for the seasons. What relationships still fit and which don’t. This is not about judging those people. It’s allowing them to become who they’re meant to become. It’s about allowing yourself to become the best person you can become. That means embracing the good and the ugly about yourself.
Yes, I said the good and the ugly. Because without these parts, you are only half of a person and not a whole. The ugly parts of ourselves allow us to become strong in the face of hardship. If it makes you feel better, you can look at it as white light and dark matter. Without one or the other, nothing could exist.
That doesn’t mean that you can’t change the things that you don’t like. It means that you are able to pick and choose when to allow that part of yourself out. By allowing it play, you are less likely to have unannounced explosions. Even Winston Churchill had his dark side, as was evident when he was a child. He used to like to blow things up when he was in school and this wasn’t in the science lab. Just think what they would have done with him in this day and age.
He would have been labeled a terrorist for sure. The UK certainly had a different approach to dealing with children. They refocused their energy into more constructive ways.
Getting back on topic, families and religion are master manipulators. They are good at the game of shaming. The phone is the greatest tool for teaching boundaries. Turn off the TV & Radio for ten minutes a day and see if you can’t start feeding the parts of yourself that need nurturing. This self-care can be about exploring subjects or activities that you wanted to do as a child or an adult. I call this play, without play our lives become stagnant.
Our melting pot culture sometimes leaves much to be desired. Especially when it comes to romance; because the US’s is composed of many sub-cultures. There is no standard norms as a culture for Americans. We each bring our sub-culture norms to the table, allowing for many hurts and misunderstandings. Be it table manners? How people raise their children? How we show love and affection. The list is endless.
Men and women, have misunderstandings in general just on how they think and react to situations. Now add the sub-culture to romance and based on their own sub-cultures you can have a variety of expectations. Varying from realistic to expectations from families to romantic partners.
Is it any wonder there is a high divorce rate and lack of satisfaction with relationships in general. Depending on the culture, some people can come off as stand offish. Other’s being interpreted as overly affectionate and depending on societies trends. These cultures can be looked as acceptable or lacking based on the popularity of the trends.
There seems to be so much lack of satisfaction and judgment going on in relationships. It doesn’t seem to matter if its young couples or older couples. There seems to be such a clash of expectations in the courting ritual. It’s almost amazing when the right couples finally find each other.
The perfect romance starts in the brain and when the reality starts to clash. The end of the relationship isn’t far behind. One starts to wonder if the ideal romance isn’t some unrealistic script written off the pages in Hollywood where none of the characters could ever live up those expectations in the real world?
One starts to wonder if it is truly fate that plays a hand in matching up the two people or something else entirely.
I work with clients from all walks of life. I like to help my clients become empowered by taking back their personal power. That means that sometimes they take baby steps or giant steps at setting boundaries. They stop saying yes to things they really don’t want to do. They start to standup for themselves and allow themselves to voice how they feel or they stop taking calls from abusive people.
People who love drama and playing the starring role of the victim are not my clients. I am not about manipulative people. If you have an agenda, you can keep on walking.
I give homework to my clients. Yes, I said homework! If some of the issues you are dealing with require a Therapist. I fully encourage my clients to find one that fits them. Everyone at one time or another needs to see one to help them sort out Life! This in no way means your crazy. It means you need help finding the steps to regain control of your life at this moment. This is being REAL! Anyone that would judge a person for seeing a Therapist or a Psychic maybe needs to get a life of their own.
I will recommend a practitioner if they do a modality that I don’t do. If you mesh with that person great, if not that’s ok. I don’t take it personally. I just want my client to find a person that works for them.